Wednesday, January 16, 2013
Sunday, January 6, 2013
Saturday, January 5, 2013
My first time hanging out with a Transsexual (IN L.A)
Headed on our way down to Los Angeles for a raging party we grabbed the van and made a few stops to grab a few friends, and few more friends of friends. Now this Transsexual was a friend of a friend, so we have seven people inside the van right now, the gas tank is half full and we're on our way out to grab some alcohol. I'm going to refer to the Transsexual as Christ, so Christ insist on going in for us all, she comes out from the store no bags in her hands, slides the van door open and pops out a large Jack Daniels bottle out from his skirt, I believe the sticker price was a hundred and forty dollars. Now this is the first time I've been around a "tranny", I don't judge anyone, at any moment, if you're into that then you are but I'm not so we let the good times roll.
The van is full of youth, sonic Death Metal sound bits crumble my ears and echo as the bottle is passed up to me in the passenger seat. Now I'm not the liquor type, I've learned my lesson with nights laying in my own vomit, but if it's a night like this and a bottle of Jack Daniels then the moment arises. We arrive at the
destination. If it's one thing I love about Los Angeles is that any door or gate can have anything behind it. We're walking down the gum filled slab walk and open up a door, behind it is a massive get together. Around forty people hanging out, talking, pouring intoxication, and spouting intoxicated intoxication. I get a whiff of some marijuana in the air, of course my nose scouts it out and I join a group of 'cholos', so that I may inhale in the conversation. The blunt goes in the rotation and I puff the magic dragon, the green scales on it did my high good. Even though we arrived at this party with seven people, I'm only concerned with three of them, I see one of my friends passed out in this pitch black garage.
I bring the matter attention, and the party goers pick him up in a team victor fashion, and hold him up in the air as we crowd surf him throughout the party. His body is limp like a worm, one of his shoes are missing and we throw him in the van to "relax". Back to the party we go, now I know what your thinking why didn't anyone stay with him? Christ offered to watch over him, and no we're not going to, there's a party to attend, we're not the paramedics. On our way cruising our feet to the party a 'cholo' comes out with a gun telling everybody to leave, and well when a gun is pulled, it's time to leave.
We all pile into the car, additional people jump in, the van is packed, and I mean really fucking packed, twenty people at least. A random guy offers to drive the van, he tells us he's sober, what a fucking lie that was. The vans smashed full of people while the screams of metal blare into everyone's ear, its chaotic. He's about to park the van, instead he slams it against the curb, BOOM! Everyone gets out, what a ride that was. Myself and two of my friends also get out to scope out the tire and this small girl paces in our direction and kicks me in the balls. Then slaps my friend, and kicks my other friend in the balls. No I had no clue who this little shit head girl was, so I lay on the floor grabbing my testicles and scream "YOU BITCH, I'LL FIND YOU!! OH YEAH I'LL FIND YOU" Now I'm sure you were hoping something gay would happen since the title is my first time hanging out with a transsexual, but nothing occurred. Just a few nut sacks getting clapped in the upward position, LA a place where anything can happen.
Tuesday, January 1, 2013
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